Another School Year is in the Books!

Alice Cooper's "School's Out for Summer" keeps going through my head. Well, that line of the song does anyway because I don't know all the lyrics!! LOL.

The boys had a great year of school. Other than 2 Ns in the first semester, Ryan had all Ss this year (S means Satisfactory, and it's the highest "grade" they can get in Kindergarten). JD had all As throughout the year. They enjoyed the school year, stayed out of trouble, and even though they are excited about summer, they are going to miss their teachers and friends. They had a great year, and I couldn't be more proud of my boys.

JD received the A-Honor Roll Award, and received a medal for placing 3rd in his class for the Accelerated Reader program. He accumulated the 3rd most points of all his classmates.

Here's Ryan, dressed in cap and gown, shaking the Mr. B's (the Principal) hand as he crossed the stage.

JD and his 2nd grade teacher, Mrs. Garcia.

Ryan and his Kindergarten teacher, Mrs. Smith.

Now we are off to start our summer. Even though I have to go back to work, it's only part time and from home. So the boys will have to wait just a few hours each day, then I'm off work and we can take time to enjoy the afternoon!

Field Trips 2014

The PTO organization at the boys' school sponsored field trips this year. It was such a blessing for the boys to get the chance to do this, and it was awesome because I got the chance to go too!!!

On April 24th, JD and I went with the rest of 2nd grade to Enchanted Springs Ranch out in Boerne. It's an old west town setting where western movies have even been filmed. The kids got to see a longhorn up-close and personal, buffalos, Native American tee-pees, and a private show by Pistol Packin' Paula. She put on quite a show!

The class enjoyed Paula's show - she did a gun-twirling act, and a bullwhip show. 

The kids really got into it (and the parents did too).

The longhorn is real!

Tee-pee time!

On May 1st, Ryan and the rest of the kindergarten classes had their field trip and we went to Devine Acres Farm, which was, of course, in Devine. We had so much fun together. We got to take a hayride through their Christmas Tree Farm; learn about chickens and their eggs (we still don't know which came first); feed goats, ducks and geese; plant seeds to grow a pumpkin; and do a gemstone mining activity. I really liked that place and plan to go back with the kids later this summer.

Mom and Ryan on the hayride.

Feeding the goats, ducks and geese. 

He didn't like feeding the ducks and geese because they pecked at his hands.

Getting ready to plant a seed.

And here are our tired kiddos on the bus, getting ready to head back to school. Kenna Solis (Ryan's little "girlfriend"), Ryan, and his best little friend William Spaeth. The boys were very proud of the wooden snakes they bought in the gift shop.

The parents and teachers knew they were exhausted and were making bets about whether or not they'd fall asleep on the ride back to school. We were right. Sleepy little kindergarteners. So cute!!!! This picture is priceless and I can't wait to show them how they slept on each other's shoulders when they're all grown up.

My Christian Hike

We've always heard about the Christian Walk - you know, going through life striving to be more Christ-like in everything we do. I've heard that phrase a thousand times. I've said it a thousand times. But the other day, while I was on the phone with my favorite aunt, Aunt Kathy, we were talking about the Christian life and how deciding to follow Jesus and walking the Christian "Walk" doesn't mean life will be easy. Sometimes we don't understand why we have to go through the things we do, but we just trust in the Lord, and through those difficult situations, we grow stronger.

That's what got me thinking. Why do we call it a "Walk?" When I think of taking a walk, I think of a serene beach with soft white sand, a cool breeze blowing through your hair, and the calming sound of waves crashing into the shore. It's easy. Something you do after a nice dinner, or after a hard day to de-stress….sometimes you even take those walks alone.

But with God, we don't walk alone.

So I think of the Christian Walk as more of a Christian Hike.

Don't get me wrong. Hikes are good too; they're just different. A little more challenging, more eventful, and definitely something you shouldn't do alone.

For a successful hike, you must be prepared. Your backpack must be filled with all the things you might need (pocket knife, compass, extra pair of socks, matches….you get the idea) for the predictable, and the unpredictable. As you take your hike, you can expect some uphill challenges, obstacles you have to climb over or walk around. You might even encounter a "snake," bear, or other pest that you knew to expect but were really hoping to avoid altogether.

Just as there are tests and trials along the way, there will also be the welcomed plateaus and downhill stretches that offer your legs some much-needed rest. You might even come to a small creek that provides great refreshment and a place to rest and regain some energy.

But most importantly…for a successful hike, you shouldn't do it alone. In fact, you should take along a hiking partner with more experience than you - someone who is prepared in tough situations. Someone who is well equipped to provide strength when you're weak, encouragement when you're weary, and rescue when you're in trouble. And of course, someone who you can trust wholeheartedly. Someone who is a friend.

God is the perfect partner in this daily Christian Hike.

So as I continue on my hike, I will expect the challenging obstacles, look forward to the restful plateaus and fresh-flowing creeks, and keep my focus on the end goal. All this while clinging tightly to my trusted hiking partner.

James 1:2-4 "…when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow. So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed, you will be perfect & complete, lacking nothing."

3 Days Until Our Vacation

We are very excited about our upcoming mini vacation. We're going to South Padre Island. What do you think about when you hear South Padre Island?

The beach? Sandcastles? Seagulls?

Not my kids. When they hear those three words, they think SCHLITTERBAHN.

That's what they care about. To JD & Ryan, if we're going on vacation, it needs to include a water park, and preferably, Schlitterbahn.

So we leave in three days to head South for a long, much-needed, four-day weekend at the Schlitterbahn Resort, with weekend passes to the beloved water park.

We are excited! So excited that Ryan made this vacation count down calendar. Every morning, he pastes up another number to show how many days remain. We started with 24 days (on the other side) and now we're down to only three.

It's hanging right there in the center of our refrigerator door for everyone to see.

But let's be honest - after the last couple months we've had, and certainly the last couple of weeks, I think I'm more excited than the kids are to see that number get smaller each morning.

3 - 2 - 1
South Padre…..here we come!

Waiting….

Waiting.

Why is it so hard to do?

In today's society, we've gotten used to instant gratification. Fast food and microwaves mean that we can eat right when we're hungry and no longer need to wait more than a couple of minutes for our food to be ready (even those couple of minutes seem too long to us now). Cell phones means we can call anyone anytime - no need to wait to get home, or wait your turn to use the phone that's connected to the wall of your home, or the cubby of a phone booth. iTunes means we don't have to wait for our favorite song to be played on the radio - we just download it right when we want to hear it. Netflix and OnDemand means we can watch what we want…when we want. ATM machines mean that we don't have to wait for a bank to be open to get our money - we can get access to it 24 hours a day. Shoot - spontaneous couples can even get married in a drive-thru chapel now-a-days.

So waiting isn't a part of our culture anymore.

That's why it's so hard to wait when something comes along that demands that we wait. When that something is out of our control. When there's no drive-thru or 24/7 call center available to get immediate answers.

Like a job interview. We can go in, do our part, say all the right things, and leave with a good feeling. But then when we don't hear anything back within the first 15 minutes, failure and doubt start to enter our minds. "Why haven't they called me yet? Did I say something wrong? Did they not like me? I thought it went well…."  Some things take time. We have to remember that.

What's a bit ironic is that "back in the day," before microwaves and cell phones and ATM machines, when people were accustomed to waiting, the result of a job interview was probably the one thing they didn't have to wait for. These were the times before online applications and "please submit your resume on our website and we'll review it and get it over to the right party for consideration" response when you call to see if a particular company is hiring. This was when you could walk in the front door and tell the manager that you're looking for a job and wanted to know if they were hiring. If the first impression was a good one,  you'd get an interview on the spot, and if things went well, you were likely offered a position before you left for the day.

So the one thing you DIDN'T have to wait long for "back then," can take quite a bit of time "today." There are so many legal and political issues involved in the hiring process now, so hearing back within a week of the interview is considered unusual.

Which is when the waiting comes in.

Patience is a trait with which many of us struggle. I know I do. So we have to go to the Lord and ask that He would help us with this certain fruit of the Spirit. For me, patience requires a lot of attention to my thoughts, focus on my outward attitude, and a ton of prayer.

So that's what we're doing…praying…and praying…and praying.

And waiting…

Acts 1:8

"But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; And you will be My witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth." (Acts 1:8)

That verse gives us instruction for one of the most important roles as a Christian - to witness about Jesus Christ. But it can be so hard. What if it's the wrong time? What if they reject me? What if they laugh at me? What if….? What if….? What if….?

JD doesn't worry about the "What Ifs…." He just does it. He takes his Bible to school and reads verses to his friends at lunch. He reads his Bible during reading time in class. For his 8th birthday, he asked for a bible carrying case, tab dividers for the books of the Bible, and a set of highlighters (he saw mine and liked it so that's what he asked for). Now he uses the highlighters to highlight the verses that he's memorized, and the stories that he's read. I'm sure at some point, the entire Bible will be highlighted.

The last Sunday during church service, he not-so-quietly whispered to me "Do you know what's bad? That there are more kids in my class at school that don't know Jesus than kids that do." I know he's been talking to his friends about Jesus, so I responded with "but you're changing that, aren't you?" "Yes," he said "but I need Bibles."

So I ordered some kids Bibles for him to give to his friends.

Tonight we'll pray over them and ask for guidance - who should he share them with?

I'm so proud of JD and his missionary heart. Acts 1:8 is so difficult for most of us to follow through with, but if we all had the faith of a child and weren't afraid of the "What ifs…," I wonder how many people out there we could bring to Christ?

Go JD Go!!! Show the rest of us how simple it is!

Through the Eyes of Their Mama

I've had my dream job as a full-time stay-at-home mom/housewife for almost 6 months now. When I quit my high-income, high-stress job to stay home and focus on family, I thought I'd have so much time on my hands. I thought I'd fill my days with some housework and working out, but mostly playing with the kids, volunteering my time, scrapbooking, and doing a much better job of keeping up with this blog.

Wrong. I've been terrible at it.

I've done lots of housework and some of the other stuff, but this blog….well, it's been almost non-existent these last 6 months.

So much has happened since my last post -- JD and Ryan's soccer season (Ryan's 1st season, no less), Thanksgiving, Christmas, JD's 8th birthday, JD's 2nd season of basketball, the boys' baseball tryouts….not to mention their school Christmas pageant, school awards ceremonies, Awana club activities, deer hunting and hog hunting adventures.

There's also been a lot of shuttling to and from school and athletics, church, housecleaning, loads of laundry, grocery shopping trips (trying my hand at couponing), child disciplining, Bible Studies and quiet time, and a LITTLE BIT of scrapbooking. So amidst all that, I haven't found the time to update my blog.

For those who have said to me (or other stay-at-home moms) "Now that you have nothing to do since you're not working…." I'm here to tell you, as a new SAHM, there's ALWAYS something to do. And the work is NEVER done. It's great though, and I'm certainly not complaining. I LOVE my job - I LOVE every bit of the cleaning, cooking, shopping, shuttling, laundering, and my mornings spent studying my Bible and attending Bible studies. I LOVE it, even if I get very little time for the scrapbooking and blogging. The important thing is that my time is spent focused on God and my family - the two most important things in life.

BUT - it's my mission to do a better job of keeping up with this. Because one day, I want JD & Ryan to be able to read this blog and get a little insight into their lives as kids, through the eyes of their Mama.

Weekends are to be Enjoyed

I've come to the realization that weekends are to be enjoyed. I know that may sound weird, because it's one of those obvious things in life, but it was not always so obvious to me. When I was working, the weekends were hard to enjoy because those 48 hours were spent getting all the things done that I didn't have time to do during the week. They were filled with grocery shopping, house cleaning, errand running, and other nagging to-dos. Occasionally, if we let everything else fall behind, we'd make time for a family outing or a party. That left very little time (ok, no time) for relaxing and enjoying. And to be honest, I didn't enjoy the kids on the weekends because I was so consumed with all my chores. I know that sounds terrible, but it was my reality. People would tell me "The housework will be there. Just enjoy your kids." That's true - the housework was always there, and if I didn't do it, it was never going to get done. How long can you go without doing it?

Now that I don't have a (paying) job, my weekends are so different. I actually enjoy them. Because I've done all (or most) of what NEEDS to get done during the week, I get to spend my weekends doing fun stuff with my family. It's really nice actually, and it's made me realize what I really missed out on these last several years.

This weekend Bud had to work, so that kinda stunk, but me and the boys had some fun anyway. Friday was the exception - Ryan came home a little early from school with a tummyache, but that didn't last long. By that evening, he was feeling better, eating dinner, and was back to normal on Saturday. Their soccer games got cancelled due to weather, so we went down to Brooks and Case's and played for little while, then we headed to the movies with Kelli, Jason, Ashton and Timothy to watch Thor. We don't really know all the Avengers' stories, so I felt lost during about 95% of the movie, but we enjoyed it anyway.  The boys decided to stay the night with Kelli and I returned home to cook a belated birthday dinner for Bud. His favorite dinner - steak with peppercorn cream sauce, roasted potatoes and corn. Yum!! We followed dinner with a Redbox movie and it was a very nice evening with just the two of us.

Sunday morning, I picked up Brooks and headed to church where I met back up with my kiddos. After church and Sunday School, we came home for lunch and JD and I played a little game of basketball. He won, of course, 15-13. Then we headed back out - this time to the skating rink!!! The boys are learning how to skate, so we spent a couple of hours there. And let me tell you, when you're 36, it hurts a lot more to fall on that hard floor. I had one good spill while I was there (after running my skate over poor little Ryan's fingers) and felt it in my neck and back for the rest of the evening. Skating is not for old people!!! LOL!

After skating, we went back to church for Awana. Bud got off a little early and met us for dinner afterwards.

So we didn't do anything really spectacular, but it was just a really nice weekend with my family. I didn't do any house cleaning (saved all that for today), and it was fun hanging out and doing things together. It's amazing to learn how much I truly missed by spending so much time and energy working at the office. I thank God everyday for the opportunity to truly enjoy the gifts He's given me.

3 Blind Mice in a Scavenger Hunt

Last weekend, Stacie, Rosanne and I participated in the City Solve Urban Race in downtown San Antonio. It's a scavenger hunt where teams of 2-4 are given a set of 10 clues they have to solve in order to find each checkpoint. At each checkpoint, we had to take a photo of the checkpoint and we all had to be in the photo as well.

Costumes are optional. And we went all out.

It was well worth it though, because we won the costume contest. The prize isn't worth bragging about (a Jammy Pack which is a fanny pack with speakers in it), but winning is. We were pretty proud of our 3 Blind Mice costume. We got tons of compliments everywhere we went, and people stopped us all day long to take our picture. Haha. It was so much fun.

They started the race by giving us a clue and based on our answer, we had to go to a certain intersection. Luckily, we could use our smart phones for this race, otherwise, it would have been a HUGE guessing game. And I'm usually really terrible at guessing.

Once at that intersection (with about 400 other people), we got our list of 10 clues. So we sat down right where we were at and worked on solving those 10 clues. The answers to our clues told us where the checkpoint was. Once we had that, we started making our rounds to each checkpoint at which we had to take a photo with the logo/signage and the 3 of us. That was the challenging part - trying to hold the phone at such an angle that we could get the sign and the 3 of us with our big ol' ears in the picture. We had lots of laughs trying to do that. At some of the checkpoints, we also had to do a challenge or activity.

At this checkpoint, one of us (lucky Stacie) had to ride a bike to the Tower of Americas to pick up a button and come back. This was our last checkpoint of the day, so Stacie was a little tired when she started and even more tired when she got back. But lucky for me and Rosanne, we got to sit down and rest for a few minutes while we waited on her. (Ever seen a mouse riding a bike? It's pretty cute actually.)

The race started and ended at the Friendly Spot Restaurant. That was such a neat little place. We ended up coming in ahead of only 5 other teams (LOL!) but that's ok because we had so much fun. And it was our first race so we were just trying to figure things out too. Next year, it's on!! Although, we've got to think about how we're going to top our costumes. We've got a reputation to uphold.

A Lesson in Money Management

So I've decided to start teaching the boys some important life lessons -- one of them being money management. Since money is such an important part of life, I feel like it's time for them to start earning some of their own and understanding some basic principles of good management.

Each morning they are responsible for a few tasks to help us get up and moving, and to school on time: get up and dressed, eat breakfast and put away dishes, feed and water the cat, and brush teeth and hair. All of it must be done without arguing (with me or each other), and JD is also responsible for completing his reading log. He prefers to do his reading before bed at night, then complete the reading log in the morning.

If they complete all of these tasks by 7:10am, they get a sticker for the day. They earn $.50 per day but if they get stickers on all 5 days, they'll earn an extra $.50 and get $3 for the week. Last week, they earned $2 each (no sticker on Friday for arguing). So this morning, I paid them their $2, and attempted to explain some basic money management principles: give the first part to God, you must save some of the money, then you can spend the rest. 

It's really hard to explain 10%, so I just told them $.25 would be about right. Then JD said "It's more important to give to God than to save or spend the money, so I want to give $1.00." A couple minutes later, he changed it to $.50. I explained that once he gives money to God, he can't take it away from God, but since it was his first time and just learning, we'd make an exception this time. Fifty cents is still really awesome --  that's 25% of his money, which is a whole lot more than what the rest of us give. Following big brother's lead, Ryan also gave $.50 to God.

  

I'm very proud of JD and Ryan, and I really hope that these lessons in time management, personal responsibility, and money management are the beginning of some great life principles for them. Too much of today's society is about greed, self-indulgence and materialism. I can't change the world, but hopefully I can influence two little people who will someday impact their small part of this big world.

Week Two - Lovely Week Two

And so I start Week Two of the rest of my new life. And I'm loving today. The kids got off to school, and I sat down with my coffee, toast, box of tissues (can't stop sneezing), Bible and Sunday School book. My desire is to spend more time with God each morning to grow our relationship, and to start my day off on the right foot. And it felt really good to do that today. I'm expanding on yesterday's Sunday School lesson about "The Pressure of Retaliation." I'm really bad about that. I think it's part of being a Libra (and also part of being human) -- the anger I feel from injustice. I always want to get even. I like the feeling of knowing "what goes around comes around." But even though that feels good at first, it doesn't feel good in the long run. And what I learned about (and I guess I already knew) is that ultimately, the only person that attitude really hurts is ME. So while I'm in the "out with the old and in with the new" stage of life, I want this to be one of those things too. Out with that negative frame of mind, and in with a new peaceful, understanding, patient, positive-thinking frame of mind. Thank you to my Sunday School teacher for talking about this yesterday and giving me something for which to really strive.

So my Week Two is off to a great start. I'm still not feeling very good (allergies/sinus) but it feels good to look at my list of "to dos" and know that I have the whole week to do them. I don't need to rush around like a crazy person everyday, trying to fit in one more thing before it becomes too late. I also want to take the pressure off myself a little bit. I am allowed to sit down during the day and focus on myself. I don't have to always be moving, working, cleaning, etc. It's ok to do a little for myself too. A good friend reminded me this weekend that I've earned it. I worked very hard for many years, and I should allow myself to enjoy this stage of my life. Thank you for that Kim.

And so here's to "enjoying" this stage. Let Week Two begin.....

Out with the OLD, and In with the NEW

Yesterday was my first official day in my new job --- Full Time Stay At Home Mom. And it was AWESOME!!! I took the boys to school, went to the gym, went to an appointment with my financial advisor (only to find out once I got there that I wasn't on the calendar), then came home and did some cleaning.

So how did we get to this point?
Let's back up a couple of weeks. On Sept 9, after a long day at work, I called Bud and told him that I really needed to talk to him....about work. And he guessed the reason -- I was ready to quit. I couldn't wait until December like we'd decided. I had been experiencing life as a single working mom for the past 2 weeks and it had just gotten too difficult. Since Bud was leaving at 5:30am and not getting home until after the boys' bedtime most nights, I wasn't getting any help during the day and I was exhausted. Add a full-time job in San Antonio to the equation and it was that much harder. So when Bud got home that night, I brought it up again, and he was 100% on board.....and it was decided. I decided to turn in my 2 week notice on Monday, Sept 16th. (I had to wait a week because I had CIC class that was already scheduled and paid for Sept 11-14.)

So on Monday the 16th, I had a conference call with my manager (not my preference, but since she was getting ready to leave town for the week, I had to do it over the phone), and broke the news. She was surprised but also happy for me as she knew this was something I've wanted for a while, and have always kind of grappled with the challenges and guilt of being a working mom. She asked me to consider staying longer and decided she'd talk with HR to see if they could work on an incentive. I waited for about a week and found out that next Monday that they weren't able to offer anything. What a relief! It made my decision so much easier. I didn't really want to stay longer, but I probably would have. Not because I loved the work, but because I loved my friends and coworkers and I would have done it to help them out. But no offer came through, so it was announced to the office on Monday, Sept 23rd, which also happened to be my 36th birthday! What a WONDERFUL birthday gift!!!

So I set out to finish my last week of work. I wanted to tie up all loose ends and not leave anything backlogged for my coworkers, especially Stephanie, who would be picking up the bulk of the responsibility in my absence. I ended up staying home from work on Wednesday and Thursday because the boys had strep throat, but I went back to work on Friday for my last day. It was a great last day of work too. My coworkers were so sweet, thoughtful and generous. We all went to lunch at Red Robin (yum!) and when we got back, we had ice cream cake, and they gave me a huge poster board card where each person wrote a personal note to me, and a $150 gift card to my favorite store -- Hobby Lobby. I even got a personal song from Sean and Spencer - the Cheers song "Where Everybody Knows Your Name." It was so sweet. I loved it.

And that brings us to today. My 2nd day as a stay at home mom. And I'm loving it. I love focusing on my home, my kids, my husband, and myself. No more rushing around to and from my job, giving 100% of myself to my work and leaving nothing in the tank for my family. Now my family gets a full tank everyday, and that is my most favorite part of all of it.

Here's a picture of me and the boys, yesterday, as I dropped them off at school -- enjoying my first day of my new job as a full-time SAHM!!!

Breakfast for Daddy

Yesterday morning I had to go into San Antonio to take a CIC exam. I had attended the class most of the week, and Saturday morning was the test. I left the house very early before anyone even woke up. When I talked to Bud after the test, he told me to stop and get eggs. I thought he had made the boys eggs for breakfast, but it turned out that they made eggs for him.

One of my proudest moments went like this:
While Bud was still sleeping, Ryan decided to make some breakfast for JD, so he made two pieces of toast with butter and served it to him on the couch. Then they both decided to make breakfast for Bud. So they cracked two eggs into a bowl, Ryan added a little milk, scrambled them up and poured them into the pan. When Bud walked into the kitchen, he found them in that exact scene, along with JD up on the counter turning on the stove (although it turned out it was the wrong burner). He helped them finish the eggs, and Ryan made some toast as well. He told me later that he wanted to make some bacon too, but he couldn't find it.

Bud was so proud and extremely impressed when he found them making him breakfast, and everything had been done correctly. Assuming JD had spearheaded the effort, he asked him "How did you know how to do all this?" JD said "I didn't know how to do it. Ryan did." Bud asked Ryan "How did you know how to do this?" And he responded "I watch mom." That just brings tears to my eyes. He loves to help me cook, and you'll usually find him sitting on the counter in the kitchen while I'm cooking. He watches and helps (and makes lots of messes), but he's taking it all in. And he proved that yesterday morning.

I'm so proud of him.
For many things.
For watching and learning, and building skills that will serve him well in life.
But having a servant's heart is what I'm proud of most.

Scrappy Weekend 2013

I know it's not news to anyone who knows me, but one of my very favorite things to do is scrapbook. And my favorite place to scrapbook is at Rockin' R Retreat Center in Temple, TX because it's just non-stop scrap booking Friday to Sunday, and other than 3 short breaks each day for meals, and very limited sleeping (about 4-5 hours a night), there are no interruptions.  I try to go at least once a year and this time it was in August. I usually go with other people (Kelli, Stacie and/or Erica), but this time I went by myself. It's not that I didn't want to go with anyone, but that I just really wanted to have some alone time. Time to do some thinking, praying, and recharging of my batteries. While doing that, I was also able to complete 53 pages, including some "fast scrap" pages, so it was a very productive weekend. I finished Ryan's 5th birthday pages, and my entire Paris and London trip from last year. Those were two big projects and I'm so happy to have them complete.

Here are some of my favorite pages from my weekend at Rockin' R:

New Job, New Chapter in Our Lives

Well it's been almost a month since Bud changed jobs. He left CPS after 12 years with the company and has gone to work in the oil industry. It wasn't an easy decision, but one we felt called to make. Anyone who really knows me knows that I've been very torn between my responsibilities at work and those I have at home. I feel guilty when I'm at work because I just want to be home with my kids. And when I'm at home, I feel like I need to be working. But if I do work at home, I feel terrible that I'm doing so and just want to give 100% to my kids instead. It's been a very difficult balance to maintain over these last few years and it has finally just become too much for me to handle. I can't be the provider and the homemaker, and be the mom my kids need me to be. It's really just way too much for me to handle. . . . at least too much for me to handle well. I've tried for years to handle it the best I could, but I've finally hit a point where it's really just too much and I can't do it anymore.

Bud and I talked about this back in July when I finally just hit rock bottom. I told him that something had to change. Our family needed it. Desperately. I was failing as a worker, as a wife, as a friend, and as a mom, and something had to change if we didn't want something else to happen. After years of talking about this, I feel like Bud finally heard me. He understood that I was at a breaking point and he felt the need to step in and make a change, even if it meant he had to sacrifice and get pushed out of his comfort zone. He agreed to consider his options and decided to look into an offer that had been made by our neighbor. Within about 3 weeks, he had been hired to work in the booming oil industry. He turned in his notice at CPS and his last day was 8/14/13. His first day at his new job was 8/15/13. No rest for the weary, right?

This new job will give him the opportunity to make more money, but it will require him to work more hours than he's used to. He won't get off at 3:45 everyday and have all afternoon and evening to spend with the boys. Instead, he'll be getting leaving at 5:30am and getting home between 7 and 9pm each night. That's a huge change for him and not an easy one. I know this job was a total sacrifice, but he is doing it and he's got a good attitude about it too. I couldn't have more respect for him for sacrificing this for us.

Ultimately, our goal is to take the pressure off of me so I can provide a better home for my family. I'm so excited about this new opportunity.

More to come on all of this later....

Ryan is Officially 5!

[My blog is acting a little screwy right now for some reason. This post was supposed to have been posted on Ryan's birthday - 6/26/13, but it was posted late. It's ok though - better than never.]

Well, the toddler days have officially ended. Even though I tried to prolong them for one more year. I tried convincing Ryan to have another 4th Birthday rather than a 5th Birthday. I told him that I wanted him to turn 4 so he could enjoy being a 4 year old one more year. His response: "Mom, I can't help it. I'm 5 now."  I guess he's right :(

When he woke up the morning of his birthday, I had his favorite breakfast waiting for him - mini donuts. Then we also sang "Happy Birthday" to him and let him blow out the candles on his cake.

We celebrated his actual birthday on Wednesday last week and went out to dinner at Chili's. Then we had his birthday party on Saturday the 29th at our house. WHAT. A. PARTY! It was so much fun - even for the adults.

We had an Avenger-themed party, complete with the triple-tiered cake he wanted from Walmart. We also had the huge water slide in the front yard that all the kids have come to expect for Ryan's birthday parties. It's always so much fun for the kids, and keeps them all cool since his birthday is in the dead heat of summer. And this summer has been a hot one (as usual)!

Even the parents had fun on the water slide. Stacie and Jane got it started by going down the slide, then me and Shannon, and Bud and Steve, followed afterwards. It felt a little silly, but the water felt great and really helped to cool things down. 

Ryan is excited about being 5!

REDNECK WATER PARK!

Bud and our neighbor, Steve, cool off in the kiddie pool. Haha!